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It’s causing me depression trying to not say I miss you, 

Even in my rear view I feel your hearts dismissal of me,

Speeding home like what didn’t you see in me,

Depressing deep, I wanna text you, I get so low I wanna sex you, thinking back to all those times you used my body as just a vessel, pushing me off without a thank you,

I feel weak for even wanting you after all the fucked up things you’ve said to me,

Wanting you after you cheated, 

After you left me in the cold without any heat,

Saying you used me, how could you even believe?

I didn’t even have a bed to sleep or food to eat,

I looked to you as a savior,

Even through all your shady behavior,

I still remember you chasing me around your room, saying you seen the light me, while I was trying cut my wrist to escape my doom,

Those nights when I couldn’t sleep and you held me close,

This has gone from a poem to a fucking diary post,

I’m so.. lost without you,

I’m so empty without you,

I wish I could go back and we’d remained friends,

I wish I never slept with you after my whole tire split,

I wish I chose a different path,

Now I’m holding on by a thread due to this aftermath,

I’m sorry I wasn’t good enough, pretty enough or whatever the fuck,

I’m sorry I didn’t have enough,

I’m sorry my mind is so fucked up,

You should’ve just let me do it, then I wouldn’t be in agony,

Wondering what was I, and who was I supposed to be.