(09) 9/4/82 Could I Share Myself With You?

Could I share myself with you?

I'm sorry, I can't hear your answer

It isn't that I don't care enough

Maybe mere words just don't express your feelings

I know they often don't show mine



Could you talk to me another way?

I want to learn how to communicate feelings

Is it I should feel more than I am feeling?

I want to understand more

Simply caring hasn't been enough; there must be something more



Could you share yourself with me?

I could in turn give more of myself

If you can't, I'll surely hold back

It's too painful to try this all alone

You won't be alone I promise; I will be there too



It sure seems hard to let go

I always feel so vulnerable

Every particle of me is left exposed

Left bare for criticism, what I fear is criticism

But, we could learn this, if we tried, with each other's help



I'd like to talk with you, and without the words

There's so much we could learn and gain

I want this much for me

I want the same for you

But, I cannot do this all alone; I want to talk to you



We could see what others don't find by simply looking

Listen to each other when no one else can hear us

Get a real taste of life and savor every mouthful

Inhale each and every breath of life, smelling all its glory

And FEEL until our bodies ache, but really know some meaning



I'd like to share myself with you

And hope that you could share yourself with me

So that we may understand more and really feel

The meaning in our lives

And also find real love right inside.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

I no longer knew where Tom was.  I only knew he didn't want me any more and hated our baby.  I thought of the friend in high school I once knew who aborted hers.  She said, "I didn't see IT as a life.  I saw it as a sickness.  I just got rid of the sickness."  Tom never called the baby "baby."  It was always "that."  I wanted to help him.  I wanted him to learn to talk about his feelings. I thought if only he'd let me in, and let his feelings out, he'd know love was the only answer.

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