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Rob's Letter To Ollie
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Not Forgotten Ollie, first of all I want to say,
I’m sorry. Not just for what I’m
about to do but all the shit I’ve
done You were a better friend than
I deserved, and your still a better
friend than I deserve. I just need
to make that clear right from the
start. The truth is, since Vicky
died...what I mean to say is...
I just feel so fucking empty inside
and I know it’s not just me, I know
I’m not alone. I know there are
places I can go and people I can
see, I know I could talk to you.
But I don’t see the point any more.
Everything is dead to me. I’m a
killer Ollie I may not have meant
it, but I Still killed a man. And
all he wanted was forgiveness.
He was only trying to drive home,
but the sight of that car Ollie, I
couldn’t control myself, I was so
angry, I can’t understand it now
but I killed him Ollie, I threw him
off the fucking roof, and I watched
him fall, and do you know what? It
felt so good. I don’t know what
I’ve become but, I think it’s only
fitting, that we should have the
same fate. Meet the reaper in the
same place.
The colours aren’t as bright as
they used to be. I can’t hear the
wind. Or feel the rain, I don’t
feel alive. Like a ghost wandering
through these streets, no one sees
me and I don’t see them. We live in
different worlds, and although
there may be but a paper thin
difference, we are worlds apart at
the same time. I walk among the
living, but I don’t dance to their
tune. I don’t dance to any tune,
there is no music left in my life,
she was the last bit of good I had
left, the last melody. But now
she’s broken and gone.
I don’t know what to do any more,
I’ve tried everything. In every
darkness I see her face, in every
silence I hear her voice.
She torments me, like a revenant,
she follows me wherever I go. I am
burdened by the memories bent
double by the weight, everyday is
pain. Every night is pure agony. If
I end it all now, I can finally sleep
peacefully. Ollie I’m sorry I
couldn’t be a better friend, I’m
sorry you had to put up with so
much shit. But you don’t have to
worry any more, I’ve done so much
wrong, caused so much pain, I
should’ve left this world when she
did. Tonight I will put everything
right.
I’m gonna fix it. I promise.
ROB.
