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Chairman.

I could hear the faint chimes of a Church bell in the distance. I hurried my steps and walked a little quicker. I did not want to be late for this very important event. I had received a request to attend the Fairies New Year Resolutions Committee. This body of Fairies included Her royal Majesty Queen Feeana and all of the wise old Fairies. I was to act as Chairman at this conference. I have never attended such an event before and was looking forward to see the Fairies and hear their new resolutions.

Arriving at the clearing a little out of breath I was greeted by Her Majesty with a smile. “ You did not have to hurry,” she said. “We could not start without a chairman now could we?” I smiled and bowed to Her Majesty and said, “That I was highly honoured to be considered for such an interesting position.” I opened the proceedings with greetings to her Majesty and the Wise old Fairies.

Reading the first proposal, which was for all Fairies in future not to argue with each other. This proposal the wise old Fairies were very serious about, when it came to discussing this new resolution. It seems that the Fairies when at play, sometimes as most children do, overstep the line and one word leads to another. Soon a nasty argument is going on. Fairies as you know have magic wands that they can use and during an argument these wands are used with some very peculiar outcomes.

Fairies with a nose like a pig or fairies coloured by magic, very difficult to get rid of the colours. Hairs growing to and under their feet and many more such silly pranks were some of the tricks they played on one another.” This,” the wise old Fairies said “had to stop.” I was in complete agreement myself but waited to hear what Her Majesty would say to such a proposal. Her Majesty agreed and the resolution was passed. I then mentioned what, if any, would be the punishment for a Fairy if they broke this resolution. The wise old Fairies were for a week’s stoppage of magic for each Fairy involved. Her Majesty was in agreement and a Leprechaun wrote down the first new resolution.

The second resolution was about Fairy cakes and the amount that the fairies ate when not under supervision. Some of the Fairies were indeed a little plump through eating too many cakes. A resolution was made that the Fairies were only to receive Fairy cakes at certain times of the day and that all fairies that were a little on the plump side would have to walk to get rid of any extra weight no use of wings was permitted. These Fairies would have their wings tied by magic until they were at a normal weight. The Fairy Queen and myself thought that this was a good idea and would help the bees that worked so hard making honey. Fairy cakes are made with nearly fifty percent honey the rest is Flower petals and finely ground corn which we humans call flour.

The next proposal was that all fairy children were to stay at school another year to get ready for doing housework. It is, said the wise old fairies disgraceful when going into some of the Fairies homes and seeing that they had not cleared away the dishes after a meal or that there was dust everywhere. Not magic dust just the ordinary dust that collects in houses that are not dusted and cleaned regularly. It was felt that all fairies should learn housework and house keeping when they were young it would help and last them all through their long lives. The Leprechaun finely wrote down all these resolutions in a large ledger.

No more proposals were put forward and I thanked Her Majesty and the wise old Fairies for there coming and for their hard work in keeping fairyland so well. I also thanked them for the honour of asking me to be the Chairman at this most important event. The meeting then broke up and after some small talk each went home. Not the Leprechaun his next job was to print out the new resolutions and make sure that each and every Fairy received a copy. He worked hard all through the night and the next day copies of the resolutions were delivered to each Fairy home.

The Fairies were not too happy about the new resolutions. Fairy cakes to eat when they wanted were they thought not a privilege. Others thought that being a little plump, well as long as they could fly it did not really matter. The main grouse though was an extra year at school for all Fairies to learn housekeeping. Everyone knew that one wave of a wand and all dust disappeared and the housework also could be done by magic. This most were agreed was very unfair. No one wanted to stay at school any longer than was really necessary.

A petition was sent to her Majesty saying that the extra year was not necessary as all cleaning could and was done by magic. Her Majesty said that they either stayed at school for the extra year or all magic would be stopped for all Fairies. Then the housework would have to be done by hand like the humans do it. This, the Fairies decided was too much and they went on strike, no flowers were painted, no colours were placed in the world and all became very drab.

Her Majesty stopped all magic. This meant that for the first time the fairies had to see where they got their food. No Fairy cakes, no parsnip wines, it was terrible and soon many fairies were very hungry and called off the strike, asking her Majesty at least to give them enough magic for food and drink. Her Majesty gave them back the magic powers on the condition that they attended school and went on a diet and in general kept the new resolutions that had been made for their own good. Soon Fairies stayed at school longer learning to do housework. All fairies both boys and girls had to do this extra year.

This was the first time that I was asked to be chairman and it was a new experience for me. The wise old fairies and her majesty had more or less shown me how Fairyland is ruled; there is no Government just this council of wise old fairies and Her Majesty The Fairy Queen.