I am a local artist
quite good with paint and brush.
I like to take my time,
I am never rushed.
The local church they phoned,
and asked if i were free.
They wanted a commission
we agreed upon a fee.
It was coming up for Easter
they wanted to entice,
a bigger congregation
yes that would be so nice.
There would be a big unveiling,
to get the public in.
Then they would set about,
to cleanse them of their sin.
But i am fairly deaf,
i"m getting on in years.
Mistakes they can be made
if someone then mishears.
I was to have free reign,
no questions would they ask.
As long as i would paint
and take upon the task.
I thought it quite bizarre,
the theme i had to paint.
Then i thought so what,
there"s none of us a Saint.
So i set to work,
my brushstrokes did not cease,
and so it was i thought
i had a masterpiece.
The big day it arrived
and i can tell you chaps.
I really was quite nervous,
kept the painting under wraps.
The moment came at last,
my fate it would be sealed.
The cover was pulled off,
the painting was revealed.
There were cries then shock and awe.
I was left in little doubt.
It wasn"t what they wanted,
then the Priest did shout.
"We wanted Resurrection,
this filth it will be banned.
What on earth is that
held in the good Lords hand?"