Maybe I Should Stop Trying to Understand This

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Flashback Fridays

The low lights hide
your eyes so well, and
your eyes hide the lies
that lie so openly between us.
Lies unspoken,
blaring nonetheless.

Each time I leave,
dust motes fill our void,
cling to the paths we follow,
drawing us together like
static electricity until the charge
overwhelms my resistance.

And the well worn truths
slip through my fingers
as I try to grasp them,
but never shatter or fray,
becoming more like relics
from some other time and place.

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allets's picture

Relics

the relics line was very fine but: ~~...each time i leave, dust motes fill our void~~sends chills to that other place and time - I feel like I've been on a voyage emerging from the portal of this art piece - allets


 

 

Beavis's picture

I tip my hat to the lady and

I tip my hat to the lady and her fine compliments! Many thanks ;-)

running_with_rabbits's picture

beavis I swear you and I are

beavis I swear you and I are the same person right now


Much Love

Ashley

Beavis's picture

It does seem we have been

It does seem we have been down some of the same roads. I wonder who took down all the signs and guardrails?

running_with_rabbits's picture

and what's with that giant

and what's with that giant pot hole huh?


Much Love

Ashley

Beavis's picture

Those are there to keep on

Those are there to keep us on our toes on the good days ;-)

running_with_rabbits's picture

ahhhhhh

makes sense!


Much Love

Ashley

running_with_rabbits's picture

ahaha omg you DID borrow my

ahaha omg you DID borrow my pen after all didn't you :p


Much Love

Ashley

ashes_theartofburning's picture

Remember ..

What we talked about on my poem pitter, patter?
I believe "Slice open the soul" has been created.
Beavis this has to be by far your greatest,
and yes it pulled upon my heartstrings.
So tender, and raw.
Beautiful!

Second stanza my favorite!
Standing ovation from me.
=^.^=


"We are, Each of us angels with only one wing, and we can only fly by embracing one another." -Luciano De Crescenzo

Beavis's picture

I am deeply honored

I am deeply honored that something I wrote touched you! And I think you are correct, that must have been bouncing around inside while I wrote this.

SSmoothie's picture

There are now words! incredible! :O

Oh my Gosh, it is beautiful! I felt every word like a warm hug of understanding! It's like you dove into my mind and dug some intrinsic truth out! I love the title!!! Super Congrats with tight hugs and a pinch on the butt for an amazing piece! Though there are no words to compare its beauty! HugSS!


Don't let any one shake your dream stars from your eyes, lest your soul Come away with them! -SS    

"Well, it's love, but not as we know it."

Beavis's picture

Thank you and thanks for

Thank you and thanks for swapping cerebral fluids with me on this! You are becoming a great editor as well as being a great poet!

SSmoothie's picture

I think the title frames the

I think the title frames the piece well, and gives it a sense of wistfulness and just giving in to what's happening. Very real feel to it, it brings it closer to the reader and rimanticising the title can work well, however it changes the mood of the reader as well as the framework for understanding the intention behind it. that said I'm sure if beaves wants to change it he will definitely find a worthy one indeed! :)


Don't let any one shake your dream stars from your eyes, lest your soul Come away with them! -SS    

"Well, it's love, but not as we know it."

Beavis's picture

I'm about as sure now as I

I'm about as sure now as I ever get ;-)

SSmoothie's picture

I am so glad and

relieved! I love this piece so much Ive read it about 50 times!


Don't let any one shake your dream stars from your eyes, lest your soul Come away with them! -SS    

"Well, it's love, but not as we know it."

Beavis's picture

I almost didn't post this,

I almost didn't post this, and planned on pulling it after a couple of days. I thought it was weak and disjointed, but I didn't have anything and wanted to post something for PW ;-)

SSmoothie's picture

and now it stands as one of your most well crafted

Masterpieces! :)


Don't let any one shake your dream stars from your eyes, lest your soul Come away with them! -SS    

"Well, it's love, but not as we know it."

Beavis's picture

Shows how much I know ;-)

Shows how much I know ;-)

SSmoothie's picture

You just gotta learn to trust yourself and us more ;)

Me in particular I got stripes and banners and bells and whistles and lots of devices that work a treat to show me when something written is really neat! :P loL!


Don't let any one shake your dream stars from your eyes, lest your soul Come away with them! -SS    

"Well, it's love, but not as we know it."

Beavis's picture

Lol!

I do Dear! You're the reason most of this stuff gets posted before it hits the trash can ;-)

SSmoothie's picture

OH my GOSH!!!

DONT TURN ME INTO A DUMPSTER DIVER!!! NO, NO, NO, THROWING OUT ANYTHING TILL I SEE IT!!! THATS LIKE THROWING GOLD NUGGETS OVERBOARD IN AN ENDLESS BOTTOMLESS OCEAN!!! ;O


Don't let any one shake your dream stars from your eyes, lest your soul Come away with them! -SS    

"Well, it's love, but not as we know it."

ashes_theartofburning's picture

What a way..

To put it.
She's right Beavis.
Don't underestimate yourself.
Anything and everything you write is worth putting up here.
Matter of fact ...
Where did that one poem go?
It was a haiku I believe ..
I told I wanted more from you,
but I still loved it.
Put it back!
..
Now.
^_^


"We are, Each of us angels with only one wing, and we can only fly by embracing one another." -Luciano De Crescenzo

Beavis's picture

That was just a quickie to

That was just a quickie to cheer PW up ;-)