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2006-02-15 (One-eyed Clown)
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Diary I feel like a man with only one eye able to see the past because he has no present or future left to him. It's a sobering thought to know such fates and yet not able to do anything of it. The tears keep falling and yet I smile, breaking inside and in denyal. I let hope wash away and live for yesterday, bringing pleasure to those I can.
Things stay the same and yet I change, for one I am a slut, for another I am a mother, a lover or a slave, I do not know any more. It all blurs in yesterday for there is no tomorrow or today for me, time rolls slowly backwards towards my end. One-eye never seeing again, the other only able to see the past, what kind of end is this for me.
