Author Information
My Grandfather's Hair
In my 19 years of life, I have never seen my grandfather with a hair out of place. The Wall of China, the Brooklyn Bridge, and the Washington Monument all fall short to the unyielding structure located in my grandfather’s head. No matter the occasion, the season or the weather, you will never see a loose string of his gray hair. He could be at work, at home, on a hike or riding a bike, but you will never find a hair out of line. All hurricanes, typhoons, tsunamis, and tropical storms could unite against it, but I am certain that my grandfather’s hair would prevail. “Tea Tree styling gel” is the name of the apparently magical product he uses, but I don’t think this phenomenon is caused by it. I’ve used it and it doesn’t seem to work quite as well for me. My theory is that these strands of hair owe their stability to my grandfather himself. They only stand still and in order because they reflect my grandfather’s habits. Never late, always prepared, rarely underdressed, and sometimes overdressed. I wonder if the hairs feel trapped, like a prisoner in his cell, convicted to a life sentence. Or perhaps they are just like my grandfather, and would naturally prefer a more disciplined way of life. You could say that such level of order, for such a small amount of hair is almost comical, and you would be right. And it actually makes sense, considering that my grandfather is genuinely a hilarious man. He is always the life of the party, the happiest person in the room. He passes the tequila around and gets everyone another round, and while he does this, he’ll wear his tidy hair like a crown. He is the kind of person who would throw a joke at you rather than console you when you’re sad, which I consider a much more effective method even if it makes you a little mad. My grandfather is like a character extracted from a movie or cartoon: funny, happy, and remarkably ingenious. He is an admirable man who has succeeded in every aspect of his life. However, none of his accomplishments compare to his astounding talent to constrain every single hair that dwells in his head. I honestly feel nothing but affection and respect for this man, mostly for his geniality, but I must admit that his formidable hair is a big part of his personality.
