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The Suffering
Is it normal to have such a relationship hangover
nothing other than the last something is appealing to you.
not anyone or anything is attractive to you at all
its such a bad withdraw
I cant comprehend what happened at all.
I feel as if it was my fault
My life isnt good enough to have that something in it
so It was purposely ripped out and I haven't became accustomed to it.
The slightest tasks seem to make me grow weary and tired.
I just hate how nothing seems right. I am in a haze
what the hell even created this haze.
no sense no comprehension. I lost lost
that my only interpretation.
I hate it. I feel as if I just made things a bit more worse than what they were.
dropped everything changed a schedule for something that wasn't even real.
I created most of it in my head I guess
now I am stuck with this change I now don't wish to deal with.
Its makes it worse to get used too. I look out upon places we went
from the window of my employment. I day dream if it was my fault
or if she had me lead on for the enjoyment
either or I am confused and feeling hollow.
Just empty as if I had some essence drained out of me.
was this the plan or did I just lose it in the end.
my weakness is I think and care to much
I was taken advantage of to a new level I wish I didn't hit.
I fell through the cracks and just plunged into my depths of feelings.
Its a type of suffering in a sense.
I put my hopes up and open my arms.
just to have my hospitality taken in and thrown back as not good enough.
well I guess thats the way life goes.
the worst part is If she said she would come back.
I would still drop everything for the chance.
I am better off alone I guess.
A love addict. a boy with to big to give.
so They just take pieces out of it.
and think its alright for me to live.
knowing I am nothing but a second.
a back up. not good enough for their whole attention.
well Ill just let this run its course.
i will just keep repeating these situations
until I \ hopefully will just finally quit feeling nothing at all.
