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Eyes to the Sun
Shallow prints in the sands,
Laying amongst constant turbulence,
As winds of a dissonant nature howl,
Pelting the skin of each hollow creature
with its granular visage,
Humanistic shadows wash over the sands,
While the carriers of such burdens,
Purge boiling breath from their bodies,
Each sweltering droplet upon flesh,
Lays constant waste to its human...
in its ignorance: sees not the value in its existence,
Each solar beam crisps the skin, folds the eye,
As if the universe were to avenge her sufferings by
afflicting her galactic malignity upon these souless beings,
Stranded upon the ocean; stranded upon these sands-
Each is a desert, and deserted nonetheless,
Above, day and night pursue each other in an eternal chase,
While below, one can only wait,
Wait for the moment of ascension into a higher realm.
I am not good with critiques. Great poem
With each poem I read, I am becoming convinced of two things: 1.) You have a tremendous talent; 2) that talent is highly literate, and highly aware of the larger issues in the background of each poem. I think you have a magnificent future as a poet; because, from what I have read, you are having a magnificent present as a poet, too.