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Doom Cocoon
Closer than ever to being gone forever
Interred in the blind eye of my storm
I cannot see through its murky misery
In exhausting emptiness myself I mourn
Wondering if or when I’ll be returning
Bedeviled, soulless, sorrowful swirling
I cannot live free entangled in agony
Alarming thinking of sudden self-killing
My weary world waning while spinning
Stuck in an intrusive storm swarming
Falling down a suicidal spiral staircase
The end of me appears to be beginning
An awful enemy disguised as thoughts bores into me
Overwhelming my brain and hammering at my heart
Corrupted choices I’m choosing
Much of me I’m losing
Debilitatingly drained
Invasively overthrowing
Predatorily paused in pain
Thinking myself into dying
What is this that won’t leave me alone?
What lives in me that wants me to die?
Its barrier blinds so I can’t see
So well it tells convincing lies
Its mission is to murder me
My death it’s desiring
Invisible in my ill thinking
Yelling lacerating lies
Internal tortuous talking
Waiting to watch me die
Did something seep into me that night as a child?
A vile voice from the whirlwind whispering to me
A sight in the night-light’s dim light sent me reeling
Shadow mist floating in the corner of the ceiling
Innocence invaded that night of plight as a child
Morbid mist manifested in my macabre room
Paralyzed and since then partially defiled
In its thicket of terror I was entombed
Did it slither and soak into me?
Hiding in a corner of my skull
It craves complete control
The hateful unexplainable
The unreal unfathomable
An entity with no explanation for
Contaminated since to my core
Ever evolving against my defenses internally
New worrisome ways to cause me suffering
Feeling the feeling I never want to feel
It strays me
Listening to its deafening lies
It frays me
Wanting to watch me die
Sable silk swirling
Everything fading
I fade too
Virulent voice whispering
It imprisons me
I imprison you
Encasing, wicked weaving
I am removed
On me it's feasting
My spirit starving
A cruel choice I choose
Possessed, pestilent stewing
A life of living I lose
Sabotaging silk surrounding
I despair in the fatal feeling
Paralyzed in its doom cocoon
Into my demise I am turning
Sinking thinking led to dying
Consumed in my doom cocoon
Consumed forever far too soon
By Adam Keith McElwain
Copyright Adam Keith McElwain Poetry
