Quotes From John Clifford Lehman Jr 1955-1991

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Quotes From John Clifford Lehman Jr  1955-1991


"

I had a while as an atheist but now look upon it  

as a philosophy is the cans tied on the back of a shotgun wedding car."

*

"Once you have been the great hitter of love it's time to become the great coach of love."

*

"I ran for first Godhood last week and lost so now I'm playing
third."

*

"I was a victim of exhaustion from examining my conscience."

*

"We cannot rest. We have more chimneys to go down."

*

"The Pope is Catholic. Jesus is beyond the division of sect."

*

"The mandate bird flies away so quickly after an election. It is
not that the public is fickle but that the bird was mythical."

*

"Love your enemies. You never really know what your friends think
of you."

*

"You have enfired my love. You can never fire my love."

*

"12 step programs assert that nonbelievers may someday believe in God if now they can believe in the believers in God."

*

"I know one man who was so divided about whether to go
to Vietnam.. or to be a conscientious objector.. he
became a schizophrenic.  They put his name on the Vietnam War Memorial twice.."

*

"We have a friend who generates heat by rubbing his cold heart against his dry brain."

*

"Greater love hath no man than to live his life for his friend."

*

"I read that the antiChrist is distance."

*

"The door to heaven and hell are the same door."

*

"I'd get out of bed and get my wife coffee
but I don't want Colombo to see me naked."

*

"They have now discovered that the Messiah has come again..
they can't release the news til he gives up smoking."

*

"Humor makes connections where logic fails."

*

"At the North Pole, all directions are south. Take 1 step
in any direction and the world of East, West, North and South
reappears. When stuck in indecision, take 1 step in any direction."

*

"Women have been on pedestals, men on thrones."

*

"If you break Lizzie Borden's crime into a number of tiny bits,
no piece would be big enough to convict her of a crime, said
Clarence Darrow."

*

"Lady Conductor......She raised her baton....and Beethoven answered

*

"You do not need to believe you are Christ to act like Him."

*

"His wife has transcended duality. All are one... until an attractive woman walks into the room."

*

"My wife and I are one. To each other we chirp. To humans
we talk philosophy."

*

"My wife organized the Jewish Women's Caucus boycott of Moses..
wait.. ! I am receiving a correction !
My wife was the VERY LAST woman to join the Jewish Women's
Caucus boycott of Moses!"

*

"Dodging winks is the game of a faithful man."

*

"My mother's heart is so big it has its own zip code."

*

"I went to school every day with my John Glenn astronaut lunchbox
and inside it was wrapped my mother's love."

*

"The Holy Spirit is here.  He's playing third base."

*

"It's best to wait until the other guy draws because he won't."

*

"I'd rather be with Charles Manson an hour after he won the lottery
than with Albert Schweitzer during a bout of diarrhea."

*

"I used to think my only choices were to be a hero going to hell or a chicken going to hell. Now I realize a loving God could never create anything but perfection out of His perfection. Nor
does God desire one jot of unnecessary suffering."

*

"I say 'man' as downbeat for the rhythm of a sentence."

*

"When I was younger I thought that if prayer worked the
CIA would have nuclear prayer jammers around the world."

*

"The nihilism I was taught in philosophy class nearly destroyed me."

*

"John Connally comes out onto his estate lawn in pajamas
surveying the forced auction of his possessions and asks if anyone
has a cup of coffee."

*

"The faces of starving children won't leave my mind... like uranium waste in a dumpsite."

*

"Sometimes it is not necessary.. to solve he problem.
Changing angle of vision...dissolves the problem ."

*

"Don't hold onto yesterday's manna... today's is better."

*

"As the dam separates the river from itself, so does rebellion separate us from God."

*

"Satan is the reverse mirror image of Jesus."

*

"When I was little the minister in our church said we were all
sinners and I thought Not my Uncle Bill."

*

"I prefer veni and vici to VD."

*

"Answers are evil. I try to remain in the hub of all possibility."

*

"Many have screwed the truth, but few
have called her the next day."

*

"God made blacks to find out which whites were going to hell.
He made universities as a place where smart people need
not tell the truth."

*

"The only moment of victory for the champion runner is the precise second he crosses the finish line, when most in the stands could
beat him."

*

"It's time we declared love on Muslim countries."

 *

"Do not donut."

 *

"My father's will was so powerful it was a police escort into reality."

 *

"Hell...is the no smoking section of heaven."

 *

 "I was a tv monitor for the NSA. I was supposed to report any sudden weight changes in Mother Angelica."

 +

When I was in bed with rose I did not think of lying beneath a bed of roses


 

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