Icy Waters (I Fear You)

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To God

Took my leave then walked away

Two week pink slip just doesn’t explain

The reasons why I just have to leave

The reasons why I just can’t stay

Have nothing to do with you

None of this is your fault



Last week I made a promise

In the form of faded tattoo ash

A cross strewn across my forehead

And as I knelt down I confessed my doubts

Internal shouts pleading for my forgiveness

Were answered with undeserved deliverance



Rescue me from these icy waters

You, the Son of Man

Me, the son of sinners

Am I really worthy of all You’ve given me

I fear I am not

I fear You



Seems I’ve been finding happiness in lust

But it was fleeting, now an open and empty box

I am naked, I am bare, I am waiting, I am here

To heed the consequences I have rendered

To feed the hearts that I have depleted

I concede this moment unto You



Rescue me from these icy waters

You, the Son of Man

Me, the son of sinners

Am I really worthy of all You’ve given me

I fear I am not

I fear You



I have left You so many times with arms open

I have said to You so many times with my heart jaded

That if You aren’t going to answer my prayers, why should I pray

And yet I find You here as if none of that had ever happened

I don’t understand how a Love can be so pure

I guess I don’t need to because it is



Rescue me from these icy waters

You, the Son of Man

Me, the son of sinners

Am I really worthy of all You’ve given me

I fear I am not

I fear You

Author's Notes/Comments: 

I wrote this after Ash Wednesday.

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