PostPoems Be Artistic. Be Creative. Be Inspired!

All thoughts and feelings aside
sometimes it takes all the joy out of being alive
always scared of abandonment, and emotional abuse
sometimes i'm cheerful, sometimes i have passing thoughts of acting out on it

i don't want to seem so desperate
neglectful, but needy at the same time
the responsibility of all the stupid things is mine
causing fights, just to get attention
burning, cutting, starving, and shaking inside

i don't believe in adjusting according to taste
i dont remember what i do sometimes
even when i'm awake, or clear, or shaken
passive aggressive, non violent, misbehaved
self medicated, and no longer waiting to be saved

passing judgement on my self to pass the time
passing judgement on everyone and everything
in a subtle and intense sort of way
one day everyone is gonna pay

self disgust is my biggest obsession except for guilt, and fear
lying to yourself is easier than, telling the truth, at least as it appears

you don't deserve the basics and self respect
everything is okay when needs are neglected
alcohol, and cigarettes, and bottles and powder and joy
and burning, and cutting, and carving, and starving, and fighting just to stay alive
some would call it self abuse, but there's nothing left to destroy