Hot Chocolate

inside the wind whistles, piercing like street sweeper bristles,
so tired it's amazing, each eyelid laboriously raising,
falling into each day, asleep but the night won't go away,
the picture perfect poses, twisted like the veins inside roses,
inaccurate descriptions, pain shades inaccurate depictions,
soulless words spoken, love complete when broken,

hot chocolate, during this instant life stands still,
sipping, slipping, listening to intuition's buzzkill,
looking at every relationship like it's a power struggle,
like never innocuous is the wink, spoon or snuggle,
all for something, or a little bit more,
like cheating, when i told her i went to the store,
main dish a dirty penis, side dishes of sleaze and a stuffy nose,
friendless, but i'll tell her about my imaginary escapades, my imaginary bros,
i'll tell her how much i like her, coaxing the 'i love you' from shallow breasts,
get it, got it, done - on to the next as my desire never rests,
princess? nah you're just another narcissist, another daughter,
swimming amongst peer pressure, drowning in the scalding water,
nah, the truth is i don't even get to square one, i'm back on the first circle,
backwards, back to her, back to the 90's like i'm an unknown steve urkle,
the hardest thing about figuring out life: figuring out what you desire,
figuring out which ones are real, which ones are smoke from a heart's fire,
figuring out how much you actually desire it, too much trickery inside here,
inside the place where my secrets reside, the place churning every fear,
2 in the morning, the moon still reeling from being night-kissed,
i ask myself if i know what's going on - any clue i haven't the slightest...

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