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#29.1- "Aposiopetic Quirk"
There is a certain pleasure in the pain,
A certain relief from what you're feeling.
Even while the blood flows,
You feel hope.
And sure, there is a bit of desperation involved.
There must be.
Why else would you do this?
Why else cause the pain?
Because it makes you feel in control,
You're the one who decides
when and where
the pain will happen.
You constantly ask yourself, "Why me?
What did I do to deserve this?"
Nothing dear, nothing.
It's them.
It's not you're fault.
Stop handing out blame.
You just want to make it stop,
Everything.
All the pain.
You're afraid you're losing yourself.
Losing a grip on reality.
Losing a grip on the your will.
What have you become?
You don't want to die.
But this seems the only way,
to save yourself.
The final alternative to that unwanted outcome.
It's a Catch-22 paradox.
