Dear period
I HATE YOU! I MEAN REALLY, ACTUALLY, DEEPLY, PASSIONATELY FUCKIN HATE YOU! And its not because commercials for every tampon, pad, and might as well be invasive diaper, have shown me that you are an embracing aunt who always comes for a visit at the most in opportune moments, or because of that awkward talk with my mom when I was 13 which suddenly made her think we were chummy despite her hugging me at my grade 8 grad in front of ALL my friends, or even the fact that you hang out with cramps which could register ON THE GOD DAMN RICTOR SCALE! No, I really, actually, deeply, passionately fuckin hate you…because I just so happened to like that pair of underwear I was just wearing…so thanks
Sincerely,
The woman who will seriously rip out her ovaries and go through menopause if you so much as think about going NEAR her favourite pants!