PostPoems Be Artistic. Be Creative. Be Inspired!

Bill grinned to himself

‘My plan has worked well’

Bell cried to himself

Just sorrow in a shell.



The plan in question

Was a cunning one indeed

Over the following verses

True horror you will read.



Bill was a nice guy

With a lot of power

So he had trapped a lady

Up in his tall tower.



Bill would tell her

One day all this will be yours

What the curtains? came a reply

No silly, marry me of course



This lovely pretty girl

Who’s name I shalln’t name

The winner of the battle

Her hand he would claim



Bill could not win alone

This he understood

Enlist sexbomb Nick

The elf from the wood



But to find the Elf

Bill had to complete a task

Go find trollman Tipple

It was him he should ask



So into the woods

To find the legendary Tip

Took with him his pet snake

To keep him safe on his trip



Once he found tipple

He had a bargaining chip

‘Give me the information’

And my snake Bite you can grip



Tip agreed at once

Quickly spilt the beans

Bill thought to himself

I don’t know what that means



Bill continued on

Pondering what the tip mused

‘Ah right ok’

Now im not confused



Bill changed direction

Then changed his pace

Knowing where he’s going

A smile crept onto his face



But someone else was happy

Grinning an evil smirk

My plans set in place

And they will work



E**a kept track

Watching on sky news

Listening to Eamon holmes

Taking in his views



But what E**a saw from above

Wasn’t what bill saw from below

What lay ahead of him

Really a plan dark and low



But finally found the Elf

Without much ado

Oh My the size of his ….

So the rumours were true



Bill must ask

This elf nick for advice

Nick pointed where to go

And said knock loudly, twice



As soon as bill left

Bell ran up behind

Anxious to find out

What bill travelled to find



‘You sure you want to know?’

Nick questioned him

‘OK follow him then’

Your chances are slim



Bill walked along

Not knowing whats ahead

But Nick couldn’t do bad

So I shall not dread



As Bill approached

With bell but twenty feet back

Reached for the handle

And twice gave a crack



Knocking on the door

Knocker shaped as a tit

Bill thought to himself

Sounds like a fuse being lit



E**a screamed at them

JUST RUN, DON’T YOU SEE!

But realising they cant hear her

Went and made a cup of tea



So as you will see

Just one second more

3 tonne of TNT

explodes through the door



So with Bill and Bell dead

And E**a still alone

Nick takes off his green hat

And calls tipple on the phone



‘Haha we done it’

Nick informed his mate

Cant believe they fell for it

  We no longer have to wait



So off they went

Two cunning friends

Got their friend Emma back

And that’s how the story ends



So everyone is happy

And they all go see spiderman

And eat lots of popcorn

In the way a core three can!





Based on a true story