GURU

So I sent an inviting email
To a bunch of Internet Women
Asking them to join me for lunch
Set my lonely heart to sail
 
My Yahoo Bell rang a Lady replied
Star Heart my new Love I sighed
Her photo my future Mediterranean Bride
Feelings unleashed Love’s flood tide
 
I read her profile
Intelligent, Funny, Spiritual
Loves the Water, Forest, Mountains
Italian Goddess with a Mona Lisa Smile
 
Raven Black Hair, Ruby Red Lips, Smooth Olive Skin
A body built for sin
I need to be in
But first...Her Mind...Her Soul...I must Win
  
I received a second email reply
She wrote I might be her type of guy
My photo did not make her cry
She wanted to know more about my Spiritual Side...Had I ever been to Mumbai
 
God is this woman for real
She loves Foreign Films...She is already making me squeal
Yoga...Spirituality...She can make my soul heal
This girl might be the real deal
 
I woke up the next day strangely sad
I checked my email a Star Heart new message was there
Her GURU suddenly died..She said she could not talk
She asked for a break to sort things out...This was Bad
 
My desire, my heart on fire...cooled
Her Spiritual Leader overruled
Again Love played me the Fool
Another Lesson learned at Heartbreak School
 
I said a prayer to her Guru asking if I am the one for his Chela
Will Love unite our two souls
Will we come together
Will I be her Special Fella
 
So I drank some of India’s finest Chenin Blanc and went to bed
I dreamt of the Guru who I thought was dead
I was frozen with fear as he approached me and placed his hand on my head
I turned to run but my legs were like lead
 
The Guru told me in my current Life I will never find a Woman's Love
Poets are cursed from birth
The only Love they can receive is from writing about Suffering and Loss
The wife you seek was never born...She is still above
 
I fell to my knees and begged the Guru please give me hope
I hate being a poet I only do it to save me from the rope
I am a coward writing is the only way I can cope
The Guru warned me to be careful too much Chenin Blanc will make me a Tope
 
The hope I give you now is for all mankind
Love everyone and everything
Take no day for granted
Explore Spirituality and a Higher Power so your soul, body and mind will learn to be
kind
 
Then the Guru struck my face and I awoke
This dream nightmare was no joke
The Guru wore a purple and yellow mourning cloak
Maybe I need more Chenin Blanc to give my soul and mind a good soak
 
 

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