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Forgiveness
Although you made my world black on the inside, birds chirp, the dog plays, and the clouds sail like ships in a blue sea high above the real ocean,
Our soulless party pictures sit regretfully gathering dust alone upon a shelf, the sun shines brightening an already dark world,
My heat feels cold and dead but it beats strongly pulsing, and warming my soul with sorrowful love,
Bottles of all sorts litter my floor, (LP) just like the bottle my life was once full now drained and empty, never have I cried for any one I ever lost, but I literally cried rivers for you
The blood was washed away long ago but it stains my hands like I was the one holding the razor the warm crimson liquid still runs down my wrists filling me with guilt,
I still feel the love that we shared, no longer can you “bum me one?” that last cigarette we never shared, still burns in my soul filling me with smoke killing me slowly, just like they did to you,
My heart aches longing for one last moment with you my hand tightens around the freshly opened bottle; it plummets to the wall erupting across the lonely room,
The flower sits beautifully giving this sad world a small amount of grace the tree gives life to the world of hatred, I walk, running my hand across the fence of the graveyard where you were buried, thinking about how the others sadly waste their life indulged in grief,
Hope blossoms
I plant a seed of happiness in my soul; it spreads like vines covering the thorn bushes of hate, with silver flowers of joy, smiles creep on my face day by day growing bigger,
I step in the light of that warm sun filling the empty void you left me with, I pull the razor away from my own arm thinking of what I would do to them…
Would it do to them what it did to me, would they too hold there own razor to there own arm trying to trying to join me, flash backs of us having fun smiling doing stuff that we world have to go to Amsterdam to do legally l-o-l god all our inside jokes that I can only share with my self, my point is that I still miss you,
Every time I do something that we would have done together, my smile fades
I know that you had your reasons for what you did and I have my reasons to never do them, because
(Long pause)
Because I love my friends, hell I love strangers but I put my friends first, they care what I do and I care what it would do to them. Did you?
The words “I love you” are empty when you say them, but here my voice, here it coming from the deepest part of my hart, here it say; I forgive you (2+) with what little love I have left I forgive you
For all the times I fought with my self debating whether I should join you or not, even for when I tried to, I forgive you, no matter what I forgive you.
Love is hard to find in this world we lose thing so easily, forgiveness is on of the best ways to love, I learned that the hard way, try no to screw up what you may have, because it can be lost with out an effort.
In loving memory of Ace.
