disgust.

just the other night my pillow smelled like you
for some reason i sniffed and sniffed and sniffed it
i inhaled it
breathed it
sucked it in
and then i realized what it reminded me of
it reminded me of you
and then i retched
inside my mind i retched and screamed and died
i hated that i loved it
i hated that i loved you
i hated that i remembered you so fondly
that your smell was intoxicating and addictive
that i smelled it and wanted more
how dare you smell so appealing
when to me your so appauling!

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