Author Information
Nights Like This
Nights like this I can't sleep.
Nights like this I used to weep.
Why should I cry over yesterday.
When you weren't there enough for me.
Why should I waste another thought on you.
After all the bullshit you've put me through.
I tried to accept everything you are.
I started to miss the things you we're.
Ultimately I lost track of who I was.
I altered myself to fit into your mold.
I tried to be cookie-cutter.
As long as it meant we'd be together.
I put myself in situations I didn't like.
I've done things I've never thought I'd do.
I did them just to please you.
Anything just to have you.
It was wrong of me to settle for less.
At the time though I thought you were the best.
I thought I couldn't do any better than someone like you.
Love is blind and so was this fool.
I didn't want to see what the other's saw.
I bit my tounge and tried not to focus on your flaws.
Now I know they only wanted the best for me.
But only I could make myself see.
I thought as long as he loves me.
Maybe the good would out weigh the bad one day.
We put on such a good display.
Everyone thought we were the happy couple.
We were living life's doubled.
I never felt like I had your full attention.
I'm lost in this suspension.
I know now that you're not the answer.
No one really has the answer.
I know it lies somewhere within me.
I thought somehow that you held the key.
I was wrong...only I can turn that knob.
I have to open the door and let happiness in.
I've been boarded up for way too long.
Nights like this I can't sleep.
Nights like this I used to weep.
Now the tears have all ran dry.
I just have this constant aching.
I feel hollowed out something must be missing.
But was I ever whole in the first place?
I don't think I ever was.
I was born into this.
If I had a choice I'd never would have chose this.
But I did have a choice.
I could've pulled away from our first kiss.
Yes, I knew the risk at the time.
But I wanted it just the same.
I a pyromaniac attracted to fire.
Constantly burning myself with this lighter.
Play with fire and you'll get burned.
I still haven't learned my lesson.
It seems like everyone's standing guard.
Here I am on the rebound.
Why am I even looking for?
I'm not ready yet.
I still have all this emotional baggage.
I don't want to be walked upon.
I don't want to be used up and spit out.
I'm not looking to be anyone's bubblegum.
Nights like this I should be asleep.
Yet allt his memories start to creep,
they haunt my memory giving me mixed feelings.
Making me second guess myself.
Making me question why I am the way I am.
I start wondering what you must be thinking.
I wonder if your also no longer crying.
Seriously I'm not worth it.
You're not worth it yourself.
Nights like this,
I feel a little distress.
Reaching out for someone who isn't there.
But were you ever really thiere in the first place.
I used to think someone is better than no one.
I thought I'd but up with your fits.
Cause' I thought atleast I'm his.
How insecure of I,
To base my happiness on another lie.
This is just so backwards.
Now I'm starting to see this.
I get a lot farther when I'm cold and distant.
I last a bit longer when I'm elusive and act a bitch.
That's what attracted you to me in the first place.
You've always loved a good challange.
I wish I never gave into you.
I wonder what my life would've been like if I never met you.
Nights like this I stay awake.
I just find the pain to hard to take.
I go for long walks at night.
I try to clear my brain and not give into the fright.
The fear of being alone.
I don't mean to be this cold.
It's just what I've grown accustomed to.
I like to always keep them thinking.
I like to keep them always on their toes.
I have to act hard like this.
Because the truth is that I'm not made out of stone.
I'm as broken as the next person.
Shattered all the way through.
Nights like this I don't sleep.
Lately I've been such the insomniac.
I have to get my life back on track.
Yet I still crave something I lack.
I stay awake distressed,
on nights like this.
