Not Ok

Folder: 
Honeybadger

 

This silence is deafening.

You’re swimming in your liquor 

Lost in your fucked up trauma

Blocking the entrance to your heart

Getting colder and colder

Older and older

Quieter and quieter 

Angrier

I miss the smile that used to light up your face

I miss the touch that let me know you needed me

I miss feeling like you are happy here

Now I’m looked through

Never touched

Never told it’s ok

Never asked if I’m ok

I’m not ok

Author's Notes/Comments: 

After almost 8 years together and coming on 4 years of marriage, my husband is distant, quiet, and mean. He's an alcoholic and I'm super codependent.