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Optimism Raped
Just when my dreams start to become so vivid
I become mad at the world and get infected with the livid
So sick of these lukewarm fuckers, so cold and frigid
They call me arrogant well that rejection did it
Try to fix it everyday by burying the hate In me I'm with angels in the morning,at night demons wait for me
Taking my mind places I really don’t want to be
My dreams cry out why is pessimism keep on raping me?
Draining my spirit, sometimes joy be escaping me
Why am I mad when I should feel blessed?
Why not be glad that I inhale these breaths?
Because years of being brushed off in me has crept
Seems like my relationships always meet the angel of death
In me these feelings I kept, lord help me find the root and the source
Messages bottled up can become a Trojan horse to women's shores
In my heaven you’ll find wars, because hell just can’t stand it
I’ve become a poetic whore because of you hos that left me stranded
I handed you everything, guess it meant nothing
Some of yall couldn’t even wait a month for some other fuckin
Some of yall just always had an ace in a hole for lovin
That conception wasn’t to far from my bustin
Disgusting to think a child’s father is a pick out of a hat
Looks like in the same months more than I stayed up in that
You can fall back you’ve been evicted from my brain
You have been discharged and you’re definitely a stain
I got to sit around and see my mother treated like shit
By a ungrateful bitch, one of those niggas who never had shit
Came up a lil bit and now he think he the shit
We put clothes on these dude when they met, How soon they forget
Why my mother always want to build up these
Broke down motherfuckers? macho prideful suckers
With a good virtuous woman they lucked up
Because they would kiss your feet, if they had to deal with my generation
Transport me back to your time, lord I’ve been forsaken
Wasting my time and lord Ma you’re wasting yours
With that nasty bastard, your communications a disaster
I just want better days to come faster, drop this dead weight
Mines the past, yours hubby, God will put this straight
I wish I didn’t have to write so profane, but I’m a slave to my name
Author of anguish I’m a reluctant Poet of Pain
I try to hide my anger; I try to tell myself it’s alright
I hope your new men hold all you bitches tight at the expense of my lonely nights
I’m just a writer with some provocative writes
They are the lighters I’m the gasoline that ignites
Here are my woes on the cross; I’ll be your sacrifice
I’ll be poetry’s Christ
This talent has been a price; realness can have you not liked
Darkness sometimes sneaks in my room and molests my light
So I have to fight, because I hate writing like this
The optimist kiss can turn into a pessimist’s tryst
My rhyme book is like crimson colored wrists
Who else you know can make love to you with curses?
Who else you know can fuck you with these gifts?
Hope can escape
Despair just waits
Soul ties ache
Gotta close the hole
That Gapes…
