PostPoems Be Artistic. Be Creative. Be Inspired!

June 07, 2005



So… back again. In fact, I’ve been back for over three weeks. And although this is now my third visit to Nigeria, I don’t think it warrants the creation of a new “volume” folder – it’s not like the last “volume” was overflowing with entries.



I guess now that I’ve (finally) been provided with a decent apartment, and now that M***** has left and I’ve technically inherited his driver, I don’t really have a lot to bitch about. This time I also successfully dragged a lot of music equipment with me so I have no qualms on that front. I even have a PS2 set up with a dozen games to choose from… a laptop with full admin rights, so I can install any fucking program that takes my fancy. A big fat fridge with a decent sized freezer compartment, along with all the cooking facilities I need, so I can make myself hot snack any time I fucking want. A hundred channeled cable television; albeit a crappy South African version showing mainly B-grade movies and a lot of sport and news that I can’t really stand. A toilet… a shower… a bed. A long row of windows exposing the incredibly polluted stretch of water between Lagos Island and Victoria Island. A cheap plastic/magnetic chess set that has never been used. Two cheap computer speakers blaring out rare Nirvana tracks from a high-end mp3 player. A constant scrolling of CNN headlines at the bottom of my TV screen.



Bush, Blair, African aid appeal, Pyongyang, 6-Party talks, Eurozone interest rates, Carlos Mesa Bolivian Pres. Resigns, Chinese Oil producer CNOOC… Nepalese violence… U.S. & Iraqi forces detain 23 suspected insurgents… Protests in Egypt… North Korea’s nuclear program… Two non-Israeli workers killed… it just keeps coming… it just keeps coming…. Enough!



“Something in her eyes… must be the smoke from my lungs,” sings Kurt.



Oh, and let’s not forget the world weather forecast! Who the fuck really needs to know the daily weather for all continents simultaneously? I rarely give a fuck about the weather no matter where I happen to find myself. In this place I always know what it will be like anyway. Today in Lagos there will be a possibility of scattered showers and late thunderstorms developing. Expect a high of 32C with an overnight low of 27C. Every day… until the end of the rainy season…which will be sometime in November… if you’re lucky. Want to know what the weather is like? Turn off that grossly biased, corporately sponsored television newscast, open your fucking door, take a few steps down the driveway, look up in to the sky, hold your hands up in the air, feel the breeze, stick your tongue out to test for precipitation and there you go!



Ok, ok… getting carried away, aren’t I? Must be those damn anti-sanity worms beginning to make an offensive on my last cerebral strongholds. I can feel them slithering around, devouring any trace of reason that comes in their path. I try to douse them with poisons but none seem to kill them off – they only stall their progress temporarily.



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There’s a tip for wannabe “suiciders” who are looking for that extra nudge to tip them over the edge. Don’t worry Betty, I’m sure the next text message, containing instantaneous information of the next car bombing in the Middle East, or the next devastating flood in Asia, or the next ethnic cleansing in Africa, will provide you with just enough depressive tendencies to muster up the courage you’re looking for to slash those pretty wrists of yours.





“Even in his youth, even in his youth, even in his youth he was nothing!” sings Kurt.





So… what will this chump do next? Decisions, decisions… I guess it was always a case of seeing what you always wanted to see. A grand subconscious delusion to appease your neurotic tendencies. So sad when intelligence becomes a problem. Even sadder when the lack of it produces entities that are given enough stature to challenge your own. He will always be too stupid to realize who I really am…I will always be able to outwit him… I will always be able to pull off any lie to him… I will always be one step ahead… he’s perfect!



I’m so sorry darling. I tried. I wanted to be that dumb fuck you could rule over, but these damn poisons just aren’t pulling their weight! And to think the small fortune I’ve spent on them over the years… my god! Guess I will just have to keep marching on. Any takers?



No… didn’t think so.