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It was cold.  I didn't care though.  The weather was not my problem right now.  My focus was on hearing what those two men were talking about.  I tensed my ears to listen.  



"I am going to kill her!  I am going to kill that cursed demon with my bare hands!" said the one with a torch flaming in his grip.  He slashed the air with it, killing the imaginary demon.  



"It's not going to be easy.  What if the demon kills you?", asked another man who was taller than the other.



"I don't care!  The demon will pay for my son and daughter's death.   How dare she hurt them!   I will get my revenge!   She will die by my hands and I will make sure of that!" he replied.  



"You will get your revenge.  Don't worry.", he assured his friend, patting him on the back, trying to calm him down.



"Come, we must find and destroy it before it takes another innocent life.  That demon will regret messing with my family!" he said ignoring his friend's kind gesture and started marching off in the other direction.  His friend followed close behind.



I watched them until they disappeared into the darkness.  It's nothing new to see humans trying to kill demons.  They have always disliked us for some reason.  Especially in this city, Zelforia.  It was one of the new cities that was created after the magical creatures arrived on Earth.  This place was built for the new foreigners, but humans started invading it later.  They killed most of the residents.  So the ones who survived, lived in shadow.    



I took in some air after I realized I was holding my breath and watched it come out into the cold air.  I had to get home before the sun rise.  After checking to see if anyone was coming, I slipped out onto the street from where I was hiding and started walking home.  I listened to my footsteps as I looked up into the night sky.  There was a full moon whose light shimmered on the houses making them look silver.  Only now did I start to feel how cold it was.  I lifted my hands to my face and felt the ice.  It was refreshing, in some odd way.  A wound peeked past my sleeve.  I pulled it away to see the cuts.  They were healing.   The blood had turned to a dry red, looking almost black.  You could see the marks easily, there weren't much.  They weren't enough to kill, but enough to feel the scream.  Sometimes I wished the cuts would kill me.  I would finally be able to escape from this place.  



The cutting comes from everything I've kept inside.  I tried letting it out in other ways that weren't harmful to me but they didn't seem to work well.  So I let it out as blood.  It's like a drug.  I couldn't stop and I don't think I wanted to.



I pulled my sleeve back down and I looked around to see if I was home yet.  The scenery became familiar and then I spotted my house.  It was a little one room home.  I hated it.  I've lived there forever.  It feels like you're trapped when you're in that house.  As if chains were shackled onto you the moment you entered.    



I noticed the lights were off.  That wasn't not good.  I slowly walked up to the bedroom window.  I tried not to step on anything that would ruin the silence. When I reached the window I peeked in to see if anyone was there.  It was dark but my eyes were designed for darkness.  There wasn't anyone there.  I placed my hands on the ledge and lifted myself up.  I stayed crouched there listening for breathing.  There wasn't any sound so I jumped in bending my knees to silence my landing.  I tensed my ears again to listen and I heard him.  I slowly stood up with my heart beating hard.  I didn't look up.  I didn't need to look up.  He stood there in front of me.  I could feel him breathing on me.  



"Where did you go?” he growled.  



I didn't answer.  I never answered any of these stupid questions because I knew what was coming and no matter what you said, truth or lie, it always ended the same. I could feel his glare burning into me.



"Where did you go you little @#&%$!!!” he shouted and he hit me across my face.  I stumbled against the force but I didn't have time to regain my balance.  His next blow slammed me against the wall making me hit my shoulder.  I fell to my knees as he began to kick my back repeatedly while yelling curses at me.



I tried shutting them out but they pierced through my ears.  It was like having a hot rod searing through my brain.  I heard every word and every word made a deeper scar.  Then suddenly beating stopped and I heard him walk out slamming the door behind him.  



Tears welled up behind my eyes while I stayed there hunched over feeling the pain my father had inflicted on me.  I felt my cheek where he had hit me and there was an imprint of his hand on it and it stung.  A dark feeling filled me, it was warm but unwelcome.  It burned inside me, the anger I have for that human.

  

I hate you.  I hate you!  That's what it kept saying.  I hated him.  I hated everyone.  Why am I still here?  I had so many chances to kill myself but I'm still here.



I was never wanted here anyways.  My mother had told me that when I was very young, I could remember.  She said it was my fault why she had to marry a human.  She said it was my fault why father hated her so much.  It was all my fault she said.  All my fault.

  

My mother was a Jagcour, of the feline race, which arrived on Earth along with the other magical creatures.  And since we were able to shapeshift, they considered us as demons.  My mother full blooded Jagcour.  But since our kind was scarce, so she had to marry a human, my father.  Because of this I'm not a full blooded Jagcour.  I'm a half breed.  It's considered a dishonor to families but she had to marry to save my life she had told me and I did believe her for awhile but I don't think that was the reason anymore.  I died along time ago.    



The tears streamed down my face.  I can't believe I still have tears in me after so many times I have cried.  I thought I dried them out but they still fell.  I cried in silence, as I always have, waiting for my bruises to heal and the first rays of sunlight to shine through the window.



* * * * * * * * *



I walked calmly through the market place, dodging little kids who were running around playing tag.  I remember playing that when I was younger.  It was fun at the time and I almost wished I was little again.  Almost.  I didn't have many friends. I was looked at like a loner.  People said that when you are that young, you don't exactly go looking for a close friend but too me, that's what I needed.  I needed someone to be there for me but they didn't understand.  So I just played along with their games, like always did.



I don't express too much emotion because there was no point to them.  When I was little, I was very lively but that changed after people began saying how disobedient I was being.  Or they would look at me like I was some sort of mental child.  I did ignore it for awhile.  But then slowly, emotions did fade but I kept smiling in order to keep people away from me.  I hated it when people asked 'what's wrong?', as if they really care about what you have to say.  It was all a selfish doing anyway, to make themselves feel better.  So, I kept walking around with a stupid smile and my head held high.



I walked past a small outdoor restaurant, the aroma of frying chicken and flat bread filled my nostrils.  That's when I noticed how hungry I was.  I checked my pockets to see if I had any money on me.  My hand grabbed hold of whatever was in my pocket and pulled it out to see.  There was enough to get a piece of bread but not enough to get some chicken.  I went up to the chef and ordered.  When I got my food and turned back to the road I heard my father.



"What are doing?” he asked in his low and rough voice.



"I was hungry.” I replied showing him the bread.  



"Don't do anything unless you ask my permission!” he yelled and whacked me over the head.  Then he started to mumble things about me.  Saying things like how much easier his life would be without me around.  He said I was bad luck and evil because I was a demon, even though I wasn't.  He kept saying things like that in his native tongue but I understood everything.



It did hurt and every word felt like a stab in my chest.  Each time going deeper and deeper.  Even if it is coming from someone you don't love, it still hurt and I couldn't believe that I could still feel the pain after so many years of this.  It made me forget that I was hungry.  The warm, soft flat bread didn't look appetizing anymore.  I didn't like wasting food so I kept it in my hand until I saw a few kittens on the road following their mother.  The kittens started meowing when they saw it.  I knelt down and ripped the bread into small pieces and gave it to them.



"Say thank you children.” told the mother to her babies.  



"Thank you!” they meowed together and went back to eating.  After they finished they ran back to their mother.  She looked at me and said thank you, then walked off.



It was an advantage to being able to understand felines.  That was one of the Jagcours ablitites.  We can communicate with any wild or domestic cat.  We were also able to change into a werecat form but since I was half blood, I could only change half way.  My strength was not as powerful as a full blood either but I was stronger than any human.  



I followed my father through the market place trying not to make eye contact with people or they would find out I wasn't human.  You could tell if someone was a Jagcour because of their eyes.  Jagcours have cat eyes and they were not normal colours either.  We've got eye colours like yellow, black, red, or amethyst.



I had to admit it was a nice day but it was hard to enjoy it.  I don't know why.  It felt like the feelings I used to have were all gone.  It was a numbness in my heart.  Sometimes it felt like I didn't have a heart.  It felt empty.  Like a deep hole that someone dug and decided not to fill it up again.  I felt nothing.  It was just an empty space where only anger, fear and hopelessness thrive.  



My eyes stayed to the ground, ignoring everything around me and just followed my father.  We didn't stay there long.  When we finished shopping, we went straight home after.  



* * * * * * * * *



That night I went out again but I made sure he was sleeping when I left.  I really don't care because I'm sort of used to getting hurt.  Anyway, I don't think someone who hurts me deserves my respect.



I went to the beach; it's a place where I usually went.  The cool sea breeze welcomed me as I walked to the shore and let the water touch my feet and for a second I felt at peace.  I stared out over the ocean as if waiting for something.  But what was I waiting for?  There's nothing to wait for.  Nothing for me.  I remember the first time I was told that, it was my father who said it.  But it was my mother who had rubbed it in.  She brought me here and told me.  



She had held my hand and dragged me to the edge of the sea.  She stood there staring out without blinking.  I got scared so I tugged her dress to go back.  She blinked a few times as if she was in a trance and gazed down at me.  Her grip tightened around my hand and she told me that she wanted me to leave.  She didn't want me anymore because I caused so much pain.  She said she was suffering because of me.  She didn't love me anymore and that I was hated.  I had watched her cry but I didn't know how to comfort her.  Nobody cared she told me.  There's no one there for me and there will never be.  I will always be alone in this world because I was a half blood Jagcour.  



She pulled me into the sea and stopped when she was knee deep but I was up to my waist.  I started to cry but she told me to stop.  I didn't.  I kept crying.  Those words were just starting to sink in.  They hurt.  They hurt me more than father's blows.  They left scars in me that would never heal.  It burned.  It felt like someone had broken my wings.



My mother looked at me with teary swollen eyes.  I kept my head down watching the cold waves whip around me.  Then she turned around and brought me back to dry land.  I didn't know why she stopped.  I wouldn't have minded if she did kill me.  It would end the pain in my heart which was slowly growing.

We went back home and that night Demon Hunters had killed my mother.  I cried.  That's about all I did for that week.  My father was mad, not upset.  He kept saying how I was bad luck.  A curse that would ruin his life if he didn't keep me chained.  Everyday after mother's death, I was reminded why I wanted to die and slowly my hope faded.  The hope to escape this place and be happy.  Those dreams were all gone.  Now I just felt like a lifeless cast walking around.  I hated myself.  I got blamed for everything and I was hurt for everything.  I had no freedom that's why I went out at night when he's asleep.  



I walked around trying to ignore the screaming inside me that wanted to escape.  It hurt every time I thought about what happened 17 years ago.  That might not seem like a lot but if you were constantly told you were stupid, bad luck, evil and worthless everyday, it does things to you.  I sometimes wonder how I managed to stay sane.  But I had cried myself to sleep almost every night.  The crying helped until I couldn't cry anymore for awhile.  When I wanted to cry I couldn't so I cut myself.  



My soul was slowly ripped away leaving behind a fragile shell.  It felt like someone got a hold of your heart and was squeezing it.  I would suffocate until I let out some blood.  It's the only way I could stay sane.  



I found a comfortable spot and sat down in the sand.  I hugged my knees and looked up into the sky and admired it for its depth and darkness.  The moon was still full but it looked like a mouse had taken a nibble of it on the side.  You could hardly notice it.  The stars were out too.  They sparkled like diamonds in the velvet sky.  I wish I could be up there.  It's much better than staying down here.



A couple walked by holding each other lovingly.  They were whispering to each other.  Probably stuff I would never hear.  I watched them as they faded away.  Suddenly, I realized how alone I felt.  This kind of feeling always stays with you but before I used to wonder what it feels like to be held.  What did it feel like to have someone love you?  I wondered what it would be like to have someone wipe my tears away and tell me that everything will be okay.  But then a voice inside me said I did’t deserve it.  I did't deserve to be held or loved.  I'm nothing.  I'm worthless.



My chest started to feel numb and I felt that numbness move through my arm to my wrist where it begged to bleed.  I pulled back my sleeve and looked at it.  The old cuts had healed, Jagcours heal faster than humans.  I raised my other hand to my wrist and placed the point of my finger nail below my thumb.  I put pressure until I punctured my skin, then I dragged it down until I passed my wrist by a few inches.  Blood oozed out gleaming in the moonlight.  I made a fist feeling the pain jolt through my arm.  The pain was almost soothing.  I watched drops of blood land beside me in the sand.  I drew in a deep breath of sea air and got up to head for home.



Half way there I heard footsteps behind me.  I turned around to find that man who I have seen the night before.  He was holding a torch and charging straight at me.



"Demon!  I will kill you!” he yelled.



I stopped and turned to face him.  He stopped, suddenly afraid.  Then he took a step forward with his torch held up high and he pulled out a long sword.



"What do you want?” I asked, without any interest.



"You know why I'm here.  You will pay for my children’s death!” he shouted and charged at me with his sword aiming at my chest.  I dodged him easily.



"Are you having your revenge on me?” I asked and watched him loose his balance.  He dropped the torch and rammed at me again with both hands on the sword now.  



I jumped over him but he turned and slashed at me.  He missed.  



"I will kill you!!!” he shouted as he charged at me once again and once again missed.  "How dare you hurt my innocent angels!"



"If they were innocent angels they would still be here.  They came looking for me to kill me.  I don't think that's innocent" I explained.



"You shut up!  Don't talk about my children like that!", he slashed the empty air again.  This went on for a while with him charging at me and me dodging it but I was getting a bit annoyed.



"Go away before I loose my patience and hurt you" I told him.



"You don't scare me.  I will destroy you!" he said before coming at me with full charge after mustering up whatever energy he had left.



I used my powers and changed into my half Jagcour form.  When he was close enough I knocked the sword out of his hand and he quickly pulled out a dagger.  He tried to stab me with it but I moved out of the way.  



"Kill her now!" shouted a voice behind me.  I figured it would be his friend but when I checked to see, it was my father.  He was walking towards us.  He shouted again to him saying to kill me.  But I didn't understand why he was saying that.



I pushed the man away and watched my dad pick up the sword and walk towards me.  He started slashing at me but I moved out of the way.



"What are you doing?!" I asked confused and angry.



"I'm going to kill you.  You'll finally be out of my hands.  I'll finally be free of you!" he said with a mad look in his eyes.  It was a look I was familiar with.  He always looked like that when he was hitting me, but tonight he wanted to kill me.  He kept charging at me while yelling at the man.  He was calling him stupid and worthless and the man was apologizing.  He was also calling him "Boss".



Then I understood that my dad was the one who sent him to kill me and that he was the leader of the Demon Hunters.  But I wasn't sure they were the same group who killed my mother until he started saying that he'll get rid of me, just like my mother.  I didn't know what to say or do.  I kept dodging the attacks by both the man and my father with anger building up inside me.  



I kicked them back giving myself time to run.  I turned to go but then I felt a heavy weight pushing me down then the cold steel of the sword in my flesh.  I couldn't believe that two old men had so much energy.  They were too determined to destroy me.  The sword slide into my side easily.  The blood poured out onto the street while the pain started to eat me.  I gritted my teeth feeling the intense agony as it traveled though me.  Then it was pulled out with a jolt adding more pain.  The anger in me was about to explode.  I didn't want to take this anymore.



The man grabbed my head and pulled it back revealing my neck.  He placed the sword on the tender skin of my throat and started to move it across but I elbowed him in the side.  He stumbled back and I punched his face leaving some scratches.  I ran and jumped on him down digging my claws into his flesh.  He screamed with pain as his face scrunched up in agony.



I pulled him back up with my claws making him squirm with pain.  Then I dragged my claws across his chest making deep gashes with blood spilling out.  He screamed again but it was cut off when I slashed a claw across his neck.  He gurgled in his blood as he dropped to ground.  



I gazed up looking for my stupid father.  He was standing a few meters away with the dagger in his hand.  He stood there bravely waiting for his doom.



"What?  You're going to kill me now?", he asked walking to me.



The anger built up again and I charged at him.  All the hatred I have for him I will be able to release it.  I hit him in the face first.  Just like what he does to me and I drew blood with three cuts on the side of his face but he stabbed me in the stomach with the dagger.  I didn't care about that.  I immediately turned around and kicked him in the back.  He stumbled forward a bit, then I stomped down the back of his knees, making him kneel.  He yelled in pain when his knees hit the ground hard.



I took out the dagger and threw it aside, I don't like to use human's pathetic weapons.  I kicked him in the back of the head, slamming him down.  Then I stood over him, watching him bleed from the nose and mouth.



"You can't kill me.  I'm your father.", he coughed.



"You're not my father..", I replied in a mono-tone voice.  Then kicked him in the side drawing more blood because of my claws.  He yelped and grabbed his side trying to lessen the pain.  I left him there, bleeding.  I don't care what happens to him.  If he dies, good.  If he doesn't, I feel sorry for anybody who has to deal with him.



I went back to the beach and stood at the edge of the waves.  I was bleeding from my stomach and side.  My hands were also covered in blood.  I washed them in the water but then I figured what's the use?



The feeling of emptiness began to flood in again.  It swallowed me up into its dark hole and once again I felt like dying.  I decided to obey the feeling and walked into the ocean.  The waves splashed around my legs.  Then suddenly I felt exhausted and I dropped to my knees.  Tears started to run down my face for no reason.  I ignored the burning pain from the sea entering my wounds and raised my hand to my neck.  I dug my claws into my throat and pulled them out.  I could feel my warm blood seeping through the cuts.  

My head started to get dizzy and my vision became blurred.  I would slowly bleed to death while sitting here.  My breathing went off rhythm and I knew I close to leaving.  The water around was turning red because of my blood.  As I was taking my last few breaths, a bright light filled my eyes.  I shut my eyes from the blinding light.  Then I opened my eyes to find angels flying around me.  I thought I was going to Hell.  



I watched the angels fly with their brilliant white wings.  They were beautiful.  Then one of them, the most beautiful, stood before me.  She looked at me with bright gold eyes while her soft blue hair flowed around her.



"Felina Rose, do you know who you are?", she asked in a soothing voice.



"Huh?", was all I could say.



She smiled and said, " You are a Mystic Angel.  One of six that were chosen to hold the Mystic Jewels."



"What jewel?", I wondered.



Then all of a sudden, I was floating in the air and I saw a sea-green jewel materialize before me.  I stared at the gleaming jewel that was floating in front of me.  



"This jewel was placed in a selected six to hold.  This is where you're power comes from.  It feeds off your love, hope and dreams.", she explained.



"But I don't have any love or hope or...dreams."



"I know, your jewel almost died.  In its last second it gave off its last glimmer of hope so I could find you."



I couldn't believe it that I still had some hope in me.  I thought I lost it all.  That's why it felt so empty.



"We had to get to you before it died out so your jewel could be revived.  So, now that it's ok.  You're a Mystic Angel."



"What's a Mystic Angel?", I asked.



"A warrior for the Earth in times of need.  You and your fellow Angels must protect the Earth from any danger that confronts it.", she told me.



I nodded slightly.



"But, it's your choice if you want to accept this gift."



I thought about this.  If I accepted it, I could finally be free.  I could finally escape but I had to protect the Earth.  Protect these unworthy humans.



"...I accept.", I decided.



The angel smiled and told me to place my hand on the jewel.  I did as she told me and I felt a sudden rush of power flow through me.  My wounds closed up and my scars disappeared, except for the ones I made. Wings of my own sprouted from my back but it wasn't all white, it had black too.  Then the jewel disappeared into my chest before glowing brightly.



"Felina Rose, you are now Mystic Angel Aqua.", said the angel.



"I don't want to be called Aqua.  Can it be changed to something else?", I asked, afraid of the answer.



"What do you want to be called then?"



"Kitty."



She thought about his for a second then said, "I understand, you're Mystic Angel Kitty.  You draw your power from the element water and your jewel is the Aquamarine.  Your other powers will be acquired later on your journey.  But now you must find the others.  Good luck.", then she disappeared.  There was another blinding flash of white light and the rest of the angels disappeared too.  I was left alone again.  Standing all by myself on the sandy beach that was slowly being lit by the rising sun.



I placed my hands on my chest and summoned the jewel out.  It appeared hovering above my open hands.  Then without warning, it started to glow softly and a blue arrow shaped like a raven appeared.  It pointed towards the ocean.  I stared out there wondering what it meant.  Then I realized that I had to get over the sea to find the other Mystic Angels.



The jewel disappeared into my chest again as I stood there.  I felt my stomach and side to see if the wounds had closed, and they did.  Then I check my hand, neck and wrist to see if my cuts had healed.  They did and the scars had faded.  



The wind blew rustling my hair as I wondered what was to come.  I never expected this to happen to me.  I guess we all have a bit of hope lingering in us even to the very last breath we take.  



END ...of part one