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How To Hate Your Body
***TRIGGER WARNING***
How To Hate Your Body
1. Look at the girl in your math class. The one you have a crush on. She's gorgous. You're smitten with her, practically creaming your pants every time you see her. She has a flat stomach, abs defined. Her arms are muscular but lean, a result of all the pushups she does. As you admire every inch of her seemingly godlike body, you can't help but compare yourself to her. Girls do this often, you think. Your stomach is sickening. Protuding. Fat. Even if she was into girls, there's no way she would like you. No wonder you're single.
2. Every day wrap your chest in ace bandage so tight it chokes you. You're inbetween, you're wrong, you're confused. Your parents think they have a lesbian daughter. They don't. You're not a woman. You're not a man. You don't know what you're supposed to do, and with every "Pick male or female," with every "Men's Clothing," with every "Are you a boy or a girl?" you want to die. Surgery can't fix this, nothing can fix this. This body is wrong, this body isn't you, this body is killing you every second you spend in it. Cut your wrists. Start smoking. Do anything you can to destroy your body. You don't belong in it anyway.
3. Don't eat. Starve yourself. Go as long as you can without eating anything. Food will make you fat. You need to be skinny. The hunger pains mean it's working. Then, when you can't take it anymore, eat. Overeat. Eat so much that you completely empty the refrigirator. Eat eat eat. Become preoccupied with food. Eat constantly. The next day, regret it. Regret so much that you go back to starving yourself. The cycle will go on and on and on until it is all you'll ever know, all you've ever known. Starve, overeat. Starve, overeat. Starve, overeat.
4. Tell yourself that you're fat. Tell yourself you're worthless. Tell yourself you're disgusting. Never let yourself forget it. Every waking moment of your life must be spent telling yourself these things. Make this your mantra. Believe it wholeheartedly.
