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This reminds me much of my own situation, and the reply you made, here, "she did the best she could . . ." may be the key to my own resolution with my mother.  My mother and I began to clash in early childhood.  I especially dreaded summer breaks, because, at home alone with her (while my father worked as a civil servant), I was often subjected not only to her weird conversations, but to physical abuse that, today, would be considered criminal.  My paternal grandmother once took me aside and said, "None of this is your fault.  You have nothing to do with this," meaning my mother's erratic, often critical, and sometimes downright evil behavior.  I realize, after reading your comment, that she did the best she could (which was not much) with the little she had.